I should have…..But couldn’t.

I should have let you go long ago, but couldn’t.
I ignored my brain and self so that I could be with you.
I listened to my heart instead.
It didn’t want to let go.
Maybe things did have to get this bad for me to see.
To see that I could believe in myself, that I could overcome all the pain, to see what it is I am really made of.
To see the man you have decided to become and to accept that it is not for me.
Finally I have surrendered myself to a higher calling.
How was I capable of talking to you calmly?
Plain and simple, while sitting in a service for our neighbor I asked God and all my loved ones watching over me from above to send me the strength I needed to make you happy.
When we first started talking I fought it.
Once I surrendered, a peace welled up inside and gave me strength to do what I couldn’t do on my own.
That is the only way I came to do what I should have long ago, but couldn’t.


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