Are the feelings mutual?


Oh, how I’ve missed thee!

How many months has it been? Too many, I suppose. No matter. I am here now to reclaim my love for you.

Before I ask that all important question, I must tell you a tale. Get comfy this may be awhile or it could be very short. It all depends on the words. Those mysterious buggers.

Upon seeing you for the last time I found myself on the brink of a dark journey. A journey only I could take. If only you could have came, I very much wanted you to be there. The Universe had a different plan in-store for us.

There is no easy way to say this. The Great Cloak of Despair found me. It wrapped me up, like a dead body in a carpet roll, final and no escape. Darkness swallowed me whole. I had no idea how deep the pit went or if light still existed. And there I sat, for what I can only guess, as many many months. Dark. Lonely. Those are the words that describe my existence in that dank nasty pit. The walls were slick with stagnant water oozing through every crack and crevice. Bringing with it a sulfurous fungus that began to consume the entirety of the pit.

Nausea. Dizziness. Fatigue. A sickness like I’ve never felt, came over me in no time at all. When would I ever escape? Am I doomed for all eternity in this blasted place?

I know people have often called me stubborn. But in that pit I began to realize that I am not stubborn at all. No. I am fueled by a determination that burns within. Ignited by a challenge. Refusing to give up until the impossible is made possible. That is who I am. Determined, not stubborn, is the word that describes me.

And so for months I used every ounce of energy left to picture Hope. What does Hope look like to me? Now I know the answer to that question.

Hope began to take the shape of wildflowers. Surrounded by a lovely canvas of pinks, whites, purples, greens, blues, reds, and yellows. Heaven!


Then I saw the faces of people like me, stuck in that nasty pit, longing to get out. Somehow. Someway. It must be possible.


And I promised myself right then and there, no matter how much Darkness tried to torture and damage my soul, I would fight back. I wound fight back with vengeance.


So you see, my love, I fought for you. I clawed my way out. Nails bleeding. Bones tired and aching. I managed to fight. And I keep on fighting because Darkness is never far away. You and I are one in the same. I learned that in the pit. If I don’t fight for you, if I don’t choose to keep breathing, to keep trying, neither of us can exist. Mind and Body. We’re not so different. We need each other.

I am leaping off the cliff. Yelling, “Banzai!”, hoping you will catch me. We have things to do. Creative ideas to explore. Lives to change. Kindness to spread. And let’s not forget the most important, Badassery. You and I, Mind and Body, we still have a purpose.

Doctors may throw around the word Disability, but it doesn’t mean we still can’t contribute to society. It doesn’t mean we have to the let the word Disability scare us. It simply means the world needs to adjust to us. And that is quite all right. It’s high time the world valued all of its people.

We may feel invisible, but I promise you, we’re not alone. There were many others I met down in the pit. They too are looking for ways out.


You and I, we move slower these days, and that’s o.k. Together, Mind and Body, we can accomplish our goals this year. I am sure of that.

happy new year 2016We will have to learn how to do things differently. To love each other as we are, perfectly imperfect. To accept a slower pace. We may love the thrill of sprinting fiercely and quickly to the finish line, but we’ll have to gain respect for the slow grueling pace of cross country endurance. We can do this! It’s time to suit up.


Keep on eye out for the design and creation of our hopes and dreams…telling the story of surviving the invisible. We will need your help. Surely we cannot accomplish such a feat all alone. The true sign of strength is those who ask for help.

Zen Brain Creative Studio and Petals + Tea are about to jump off! Be on the look out.

P.S. Today is a good brain today. I hope for many more. Time for the next chapter, Daring 2 Pursue. 


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